Keep calm, stay cool and carry on...or how not to kill your family!

 Apr 01, 2015

I find having lots of people around me all the time, a very stressful experience. Particularly in my family, everyone is very forthright (or should that read “forthwrong”) so it’s hard to stay relaxed and not allow my feelings to get the better of me. I reckon a quick fix is simply to LOL! Well yes, from my teenage children I know that means “Laugh Out Loud,” and please just bear with me on this.

I have a different take on LOL; my first “L” stands for "Listen," the “O” is for “’old yur tongue” and the last “L” is for "Laughter."

When there’s a lot going on around me and everyone is making demands on my time, my energy and my input, I often get impatient. I can interrupt, finish their sentences for them, and see their ideas as less than ideal because, well, it doesn't quite fit in with what I had planned. What has stood me very well though, is to remember to really LISTEN to what they say. Let them say their piece to the end, process it, and then respond. Some of you may find yourselves listening to respond and that’s probably because we are so wired to be solution-focused. There is nothing wrong with solutions but first make sure you fully understand what the problem and context is.

Tied in with listening, is the supremely difficult skill of “olding your tongue.” Yep, just zip it until the other person had finished and even then, pause, consider and formulate your reply rationally. The alternative? To react and get caught up in the heat of the moment and speak without much thought. Even if you are right, you will be wrong if you lose control.

Finally, just laugh at yourself. I find that sometimes I’m really stressed but in the middle of things, my husband will say “You look so pretty when you’re annoyed,” or something equally ridiculous, and even though I want to do him grievous bodily harm, I just laugh with him, and try to let it go. Have fun, enjoy comedy and look for moments of opportunity to enjoy and love life.

Wishing you all a very relaxed time with your families and friends this Easter break. Remember to be safe and LOL.

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About the Author:

Fee Hosking  

With over 24 years experience as a trainer, Fee is one of our most senior Professional Development trainers at New Horizons Sydney. With a professional background as a management consultant in the South African manufacturing industry, Fee brings credibility, experience and authenticity to all of the subjects that she trains. She has the ability to engage professionals from the junior to the senior level. Bringing great energy to the classroom, Fee ensures that the learning experience for all who attend is an enjoyable one, which in turn makes it a truly impactful one.

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